It’s Okay to Formula Feed. Really.

I want to start out frankly: how a mother feeds her baby should be nobody’s concern except the mother’s.

I’ve watched so many friends agonize over feeding. Nursing isn’t working. Pumping is exhausting and overwhelming. But they feel like they have to keep going, even when it’s clearly not working for them or their baby.

So if this is something you need to hear, here it is: both of my babies were formula fed, and they are perfectly healthy.

They’re growing. They’re developing. They don’t have more ear infections. They don’t get sick more. They don’t fit any of the scary narratives that often get attached to formula-fed babies. And honestly, formula feeding was the best choice for our family.

With my first baby, due to medical reasons, nursing or pumping simply wasn’t an option. There was no amount of “trying harder” that would have changed that. With my second baby, I wanted it to work so badly. I tried. Probably for too long. And when nursing wasn't working, I pumped. I did all the things. And eventually I had to admit that it wasn’t working for anyone in our family.

My mental health was suffering. My baby wasn’t thriving the way I hoped. And when we finally made the decision to switch to formula, everything got easier. Everything got better.

And yet, we’re constantly bombarded with the message that “breast is best,” and that if you don’t breastfeed, you’re doing something wrong.

I don’t believe that for a second.

I am no less of a mother because I didn’t breastfeed. If anything, I’m more of a mother because I made the choice that was best for my family.

It breaks my heart to hear brand new moms being shamed because something simply isn’t working. Breastfeeding is not as easy as pulling out your boob and putting it in your baby’s mouth for everyone. For some people, it really does come easily, and if that’s you and it’s working for your family, that’s wonderful. I truly wish it worked that way for everyone.

But it doesn’t.

And I am so tired of moms feeling like they failed because of that. Because this is no one’s fault.

So if this is the message you need today, here it is again:

It’s okay to switch to formula. It’s okay to stop pumping. It’s okay to accept that something isn’t working.

Your baby will be fine. Your baby will be healthy. And very often, you will be healthier mentally because of this decision.

Choosing what works for your family is not giving up. It’s parenting. Whatever feeding journey you’re on, you’re doing a good job. What works for your family is the right choice — always.

A quick word about sleep and formula

One common myth I hear all the time is that formula-fed babies automatically sleep better. That’s not necessarily true. So please don’t make this switch expecting instant longer stretches of sleep.

However — if you do want to support better sleep in a gentle, developmentally appropriate way, there are things that can help, regardless of how your baby is fed.

That’s exactly why I created my sleep guides. They’re attachment-based, realistic, and designed to support families without pressure, guilt, or one-size-fits-all rules.

If you’re looking for guidance that honors your baby and your mental health, you can find my sleep resources here:👉 https://peacefulpeanut.gumroad.com/